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How To Let Your Friends And Family Know U Wear High Heels

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Love4heels    19

Just have your wife to take som pics of you wearing heels and dont check her facebook albums...!

Yesterday I checked my wifes facebook photoalbums...and I found a picture of myself wearing my 5" heeled boots...

JIPPI!!!.. I think.. :P

Anyone have a good explanation I can use if anyone ask WHY?

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Jinx    12

My opinion is that don't make any excuses... cat is already on the table. Now you have most excellent moment of taking steps out of the closet and let the world know you wear heels. I know it is easy to say it here behind the screen and not knowing your life and friends and everything, but still I would take the chance because your moment is now!

If you still need excuse, make a deal with your wife about it first. Nothing blows you cover worst than you're telling different story.

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FastFreddy2    216

JIPPI!!!.. I think.. :P

Anyone have a good explanation I can use if anyone ask WHY?

"Excuse"? :D

No idea, but I'd like to be there when the first person asks! :P:D

Honestly, your 'nearest and dearest' is good with the situation, and obviously isn't at all phased by it. In fact publishing photo's with you wearing heels suggests she is pleased to be seen with you wearing them. [As we also know from her introducing you to friends while you were wearing heels.] I think this makes you fairly bullet proof if it came to any criticism. ;)B)

I'd suggest it's a 'go with the flow' situation. If people ask, tell them what they need to know (and probably no more). I've been asked why when I've volunteered my interest, and not needed to say any more than "I enjoy wearing heels". Two people, a male friend and ex-girlfriend (of some years), when pre-warned I was going to tell them something startling both said; "Was that it?" Both deflated because I'd seemingly exaggerated my special interest. :o

I think you'll be fine. :)

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heelman500    21

I agree with Freddy, I don't think you need an "Excuse" as it will be perfectly obvious to those whose see the pics that you like heels.

As your wife is happy with your heeling being out there, I'D say nothing and I bet you probably wont get asked about it.

If someone does ask, just be honest and say you like wearing them. Most people if they notice will think you have an eccentric or bohemian style.

We have a guy at work who for want of a better word has an outlandish fashion style ( think curtain material made into trousers) and no one worries about it..... Its just his way. So if you keep on with the heels, people will just accept it, because they are familiar with it and that makes your heeling a normal abnormality (if I make sense)

Good luck anyway

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FastFreddy2    216

When the two closest members of our family visit, I have to be a bit careful about what shoes I leave lying around. I don't always find every pair, but so far, no-one has asked any potentially awkward questions .... It's even worse when the grandson stays, because like most young people, he wants to know everything about everything... Not only do all my shoes/boots have to be hidden, some stacks have to be disguised too. It's a PITA. 

Today, we three went to London to take a look at the Christmas lights in the West End. It might have been 'four of us' but his mum had things to do at home. I had already decided I would wear my very passable cowboy boots. They have a 4 inch heel, fairly slim shaft, and come up to just under my knee. There is decorative stitching over the toe box, and they are a bit 'pointy'. They look like a mans boot, right up until you see how high and slim the shaft is. ;)

5678221c8b715_LongbootsPart1.thumb.jpg.c

 

56782239cba5c_Longboots-Part2.thumb.jpg.

 

While preparing to go out, I walked past everyone several times wearing the boots. This afternoon/evening, I spent 5 hours walking around with my grandson and Mrs Freddy. So far, not a single comment. I'm hoping there might be some remark, to draw out any feelings about them (good or bad)  but I wouldn't be surprised if no-one noticed or dismissed my choice of footwear as "me being me". (ie. Eccentric.) I'm not expecting to be judged, nor do I want to encourage false enthusiasm, but it would be nice if I didn't feel so compelled to 'hide' my interest from those so close to me.  

I'm probably not alone with that sentiment?

 

Edited by FastFreddy2
Added some pictures.
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Shyheels    129

No, indeed! My wearing is very discrete. Although my boots do not have heels nearly as high as yours - two and three-quarter inch block heels - they are otk boots and so 'obviously' feminine even though there us absolutely nithing intrnsically feminibe about them. Ditto my flat otk boots, in brown suede. Were I on my own I woukd nit gave the least hesitation in wearing either pair everywhere. They are extremely comfortable, warm and in all honesty look great with jeans.

it genuinely annoys me when I look around and see women perfectly free to wear tall boots, yet were I to do so it woukd embarrass those around me. And yet there is absolutely nothing feminine about either if my pairs of boots, other than this blinkered association of tall boots with the distaff side of humanity.

we are off to London today too for the Christmas lights etc. I'll be wearing my hiking boots. Funnily enough I do not own a single pair of shoes, only boots - but if varied heights!

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Puffer    206
9 hours ago, FastFreddy2 said:

... I'm hoping there might be some remark, to draw out any feelings about them (good or bad)  but I wouldn't be surprised if no-one noticed or dismissed my choice of footwear as "me being me". (ie. Eccentric.) I'm not expecting to be judged, nor do I want to encourage false enthusiasm, but it would be nice if I didn't feel so compelled to 'hide' my interest from those so close to me.  

I'm probably not alone with that sentiment?

 

3 hours ago, Shyheels said:

... it genuinely annoys me when I look around and see women perfectly free to wear tall boots, yet were I to do so it woukd embarrass those around me. And yet there is absolutely nothing feminine about either if my pairs of boots, other than this blinkered association of tall boots with the distaff side of humanity. ...

Quite so.   If what I would like to wear openly in public (and I don't mean pink 6" stiletto sandals) was not denounced as 'effeminate', 'poofy', 'perverted' or otherwise as allegedly unacceptable from time to time, I would be a lot happier.   I can cope with 'eccentric' or 'different' (I am happy to be both, although in most respects a conformist) but it is hurtful to be thought of as a persona non grata by Joe Public - and even more so by close relatives or friends.    

I don't personally like to see a man with long hair, piercings, tattoos or an abundance of flashy jewellery - but such men are not uncommon, generally pass without vitriolic attack and are (one assumes) comfortable in their own skins and accepted in their own family or social circles.   So, why should high heels be unacceptable on a man, even on footwear of an otherwise masculine or at least unisex appearance, worn with otherwise conventional clothing?   Or are we being paranoid in thinking that, just because someone close is openly 'anti' or we have detected some sort of reaction elsewhere which we have interpreted (perhaps wrongly) as being adverse, we must conceal if not suppress our heel interest in the great majority of situations?   If there is an easy answer, I have yet to learn of it.

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FastFreddy2    216
5 hours ago, Puffer said:

 

If what I would like to wear openly in public (and I don't mean pink 6" stiletto sandals) was not denounced as 'effeminate', 'poofy', 'perverted' or otherwise as allegedly unacceptable from time to time, I would be a lot happier.   I can cope with 'eccentric' or 'different' (I am happy to be both, although in most respects a conformist) but it is hurtful to be thought of as a persona non grata by Joe Public - and even more so by close relatives or friends.    

 

Yeah, what he said. ;) :P :D

 

When I think of some of the 'sights' I've seen that barely turned a head or were just ignored, the attention a man in a heel acquires while in public, is completely disproportionate. I suppose it's down to experience. Badly dressed (poor choice and or dirty), are much more common, as are tattoo's in what might generally be considered inappropriate places. (Neck, face, hands, and lower legs on women that are usually bare.)

My "ideal" would be to wear a court shoe in public, (probably covered) during warm weather, and for my footwear to be ignored. Bliss! :)

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Puffer    206
26 minutes ago, FastFreddy2 said:

Pictures of the boots I wore, and how I wore them has been added to the post above.  :)

I like those boots, Freddy; where did you get them?   I assume you did wear them over (skinny) jeans, as shown.   That (to my mind) is the only really 'unusual' aspect of your overall look; men do not conventionally wear long 'dress' boots (as already discussed above), and the high, slim shaft is not typical of a man's boot anyway (and cannot be easy to put on, even with your slender pins).   The stitching and toe shape is perfectly normal on a cowboy boot, and yours are quite plain as they go, although one might argue that the heel is high for a cowboy.   Come to that, I have been told more than once that true cowboys do not normally wear even long and fancy boots outside their trousers.

Yes, I can see that these cowboy boots would pass without comment as, in context, they are not too extreme by any means.   But I doubt that they pass without being noticed - and I think you would (and should) be pleased if they are. 

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FastFreddy2    216
5 hours ago, Puffer said:

I like those boots, Freddy; where did you get them? 

They were an early (2008-2009) auction site purchase, so I have had them some time, and they were not new when I bought them. I remember them as being Forini, or Fiorelli ....and they seem to be neither. :huh:  The makers name is covered by a self-adhesive insole liner that may be hiding some damage inside the boots (I found out today) and I am loathe to remove the covering as you might realise.

As far as I know, they are all leather, though the shaft fabric is stretchy. I've no idea how leather could be stretchy, but it is quite popular these days if you have the where-with-all. I saw some real leather stretchy leggings mentioned online today for around £350 (reduced from £800 IIRC.) 

When I bought these, I did ask the seller about their antecedents, as I thought I might chase a second pair. He was vague about everything. They are very very very good quality. I'm pretty sure they are the only leather soled shoes I own at the moment. Though as a 15/16 year old, I wore no other type. (Fashion victim.) 

I have trawled my email account, without success because I don't remember any unique identifier. P/Pal records don't come up despite the option to select 2008/2009. Even the auction site feedback/messaging system drew a blank.

 

The boots were worn 'underneath' the straight legged stretch jeans, as shown. To get the photo's done today, I simply removed the jeans to reveal my 'standard equipment' leggings. While these boots are very comfortable, and with the modest 4" heel are easy to walk in, I would not wear them with my lower calves on show in such a way. Higher heeled boots would of course completely change the overall look, and help disguise my (embarrassing) ankles. As long as no-one sees the height of the shaft on the boots, I have no fear (usually) about members of the public thinking they are anything other than what they appear to be: Mens cowboy boots. 

I did have to remove these once, at an airport to go through a body scanner. It was about 6 years ago, and I had to do it in front of several hundred other travellers. A story I've already told elsewhere. 

 

 

 

 

 

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Shyheels    129

Looking over the images of your boots, and trying to be as analytical and dispassionate as possible, I honestly can't see why they could be construed as feminine other than via, as I have said before, the blinkered response that tall boots must be feminine - just because. The slender shafts do not strike me as intrinsically feminine, just decently fitting. I believe we noted in another thread that most tall boots (nearly all of which are found on the distaff side of the shop) have rather large calves/shafts. It could therefore be argued that ones with bigger, looser shafts are feminine by virtue of their numerical superiority.

The toes are pointy and the foot shape elongated, but there again not intrinsically feminine. As they say about pointy toed (masculine) cowboy boots in Texas: "They're for killing cockroaches in the corners." Nor are the heels too tall for cowboy boots. Worn under jeans there is no way on earth anybody would notice them. Worn over jeans, yes, they'd be noticed but only because hardly any guys wear their boots that way (because hardly any guys dare wear tall boots - however much they may like the idea)

I agree with Puffer - that is the only unusual aspect to them: wearing over jeans. But why not? They are nice looking boots. 

I recall wearing a pair of very tall 16" L.L. Bean duck boots (mentioned in another thread) when I was in Antarctica. Some of the women on the ship marvelled that I did not wear them over my jeans when we made landings, to show them off. In that particular instance it was wisest not to! Zodiac landings in Antarctica can be quite wet and having trousers over your boot tops is a great idea, if you don't want to get water in your boots. They women on board soon joined me in the male style of wearing boots under trousers!

Outside of that though - I think tall boots look best over jeans. I am not into leggings myself, other than for cycling, but boots and jeans seen a decent look! 

I agree too that one regularly sees guys wearing all kinds of (to me) objectionable get-ups - tattoos, piercings, baggy trousers with the crotch down to the knees, ludicrous board shorts, hoodies, and ludicrous hair styles with nobody giving them a second glance. Yet wearing a nice tall pair of boots (regardless of whetheror not they had heels) over jeans would raise eyebrows and call into question your masculinity. What a weird and up-tight world.

 

 

  

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Shyheels    129

I might add that when the female scientists with whom I was travelling in Antarctica wore their boots under their jeans/trousers, as guys do, nobody considered them cross-dressers for doing so, as referred to them as dykes - such offensive and unenlightened stereotyping would (rightly) be unthinkable. As they should be if the situation were reversed and a guy choose to wear his boots over his jeans...

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Puffer    206

Aside from the indisputable fact that women can wear whatever they like (including very masculine clothing), usually without comment and certainly without censure, I don't think that people of any gender wearing what surely were protective/weather resistant long boots either under or over trousers should or would attract any sort of notice or comment.    If I wear wellies in the rain or snow here, I won't get funny looks, however I wear them.   (An exception would be if a man wore women's wellies - the type with little coloured designs all over the shafts, as I saw a neighbour in recently, while out walking his dog in what were surely his wife's boots - nice!)

I appreciate that the women on Shyheels's ship did comment on his boots and how he should wear them, but this was on the basis of their appreciation/opinion of them as a 'fashion' item rather than because the boots or the wearer were gender-specific or worn in a 'non-masculine' manner.   Just another example of female fickleness and strange prioritisation!

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FastFreddy2    216
24 minutes ago, Puffer said:

I appreciate that the women on Shyheels's ship did comment on his boots and how he should wear them, but this was on the basis of their appreciation/opinion of them as a 'fashion' item rather than because the boots or the wearer were gender-specific or worn in a 'non-masculine' manner.   Just another example of female fickleness and strange prioritisation!

I don't know, in my ignorance I would have worn them outside normally (in warmer climes) given their intended use. ie. For paddling in a boat trying to shoot dinner, while keeping your feet dry. If I recall, they are water-tight to the top of the boots, where a trouser leg would be soaked if left prone.

Conversely, while in Antarctica, would it be possible to tuck a thermal grade leg covering into a boot even if you wanted to? Possibly I could, but what of someone with regular sized legs? ;) :D

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Shyheels    129

The duck boots are lace up, giving some size flexibility on one's calves. I did indeed have a base layer of merino tights which I wore under my boots with trousers over to shed water away from the boot tops. Zodiac landings in Antarctica can be pretty sloppy as regards water splashing around.

were one walking along a street, or on an Antarctic base, one could and, if you were woman undoubtedly wood, wear tgem outside your jeans. These boots are very fashionable right now in the US - the tall versions primarily worn by women, on display, over jeans.

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Puffer    206
wetboot    8
On ‎12‎/‎21‎/‎2015 at 11:11 AM, FastFreddy2 said:

Pictures of the boots I wore, and how I wore them has been added to the post above.  :)

Dang, those boots are amazing!

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wetboot    8
On ‎7‎/‎13‎/‎2012 at 0:34 AM, Love4heels said:

Just have your wife to take som pics of you wearing heels and dont check her facebook albums...!

Yesterday I checked my wifes facebook photoalbums...and I found a picture of myself wearing my 5" heeled boots...

 

JIPPI!!!.. I think.. :P

Anyone have a good explanation I can use if anyone ask WHY?

Like everyone says, your wife is obviously comfortable with your love of heels, and must think you look good in them, she wants to show you off!  I realize she may have overstepped a bit by posting pictures online, but I believe she is just trying to help you "out of your shell" so you will feel more comfortable in heels publicly and with friends/relatives.  The wife's intention are good, and I'm hoping her public prodding will have an overall positive result for you.  You are actually a lucky guy, wish my better half accepted/liked my love of high heel boots. 

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On 21 December 2015 at 0:16 AM, FastFreddy2 said:

When the two closest members of our family visit, I have to be a bit careful about what shoes I leave lying around. I don't always find every pair, but so far, no-one has asked any potentially awkward questions .... It's even worse when the grandson stays, because like most young people, he wants to know everything about everything... Not only do all my shoes/boots have to be hidden, some stacks have to be disguised too. It's a PITA. 

Today, we three went to London to take a look at the Christmas lights in the West End. It might have been 'four of us' but his mum had things to do at home. I had already decided I would wear my very passable cowboy boots. They have a 4 inch heel, fairly slim shaft, and come up to just under my knee. There is decorative stitching over the toe box, and they are a bit 'pointy'. They look like a mans boot, right up until you see how high and slim the shaft is. ;)

5678221c8b715_LongbootsPart1.thumb.jpg.c

 

56782239cba5c_Longboots-Part2.thumb.jpg.

 

While preparing to go out, I walked past everyone several times wearing the boots. This afternoon/evening, I spent 5 hours walking around with my grandson and Mrs Freddy. So far, not a single comment. I'm hoping there might be some remark, to draw out any feelings about them (good or bad)  but I wouldn't be surprised if no-one noticed or dismissed my choice of footwear as "me being me". (ie. Eccentric.) I'm not expecting to be judged, nor do I want to encourage false enthusiasm, but it would be nice if I didn't feel so compelled to 'hide' my interest from those so close to me.  

I'm probably not alone with that sentiment?

 

Those are quite similar to a pair I have, with long pointed toes. To me they look masculine EXCEPT for the very long toe box. My wife is fine with me wearing them when I'm with her, but she's also accepting my other styles, including ones I wore last evening when we both went to a business meeting - 4.5 inch wedges with a fairly thin heel.

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wetboot    8

Those boots are beautiful, dream of having a pair just like them.  I would have no problem wearing those killer boots just about anywhere.

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I was wearing my 4.5 inch wedges yesterday when our son made a surprise visit. I chickened out and took them off before he saw me, but I'm not sure how he'd have taken it. Earlier I'd had a business planning meeting with one of my wife's friends. She knows I wear heels, as I've worn them to company conferences, so no problem there, although I think it embarrasses her a bit. It was evident she saw them yesterday but she didn't say anything. There will be another such conference in a couple of weeks - 5000 people there. I'll probably be travelling with her and her husband (who also knows) but can't make up my mind whether to wear the same boots again or try some block heel oxfords, which would be a bit cooler but more obvious.

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