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Tacchi Alti

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I don't know if this is absolutely true but .....

For most men who have a taste for wearing a heel, it's a big secret. Not true of everyone obviously, but I would suggest by far and away the largest proportion of men into heels, have it as a closely guarded secret they share with no-one. To get involved with a group can be a relief. (I am mindful of a story retold during a HH meet organised on HHplace in 2008. A fella had made mention to having serious mental health issues thinking he was unique in his high heeling interest, only to find he was one amongst many. The 'relief' of finding the group changed his whole outlook.)

When an interest has been buried/hidden/repressed for a significant period (years perhaps), how easy is it to change that, and join a public forum? I'm fairly outgoing, and I know you to be too. A couple of others here are not shy either. Are we here because our personalities have overcome the barriers to joining/participating in a group?

Bit heavy, but getting responders to join in here, seems more of a challenge than I thought it might be? And I know men wearing heels is more common than most people believe as I've moved on quite a few pairs of heels over the last 7 years, and MANY have been sent addressed to men. B)

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I know I've become less and less worried about what people think, but that is an almighty hurdle for most of us. My wish to do just whatever I want is tempered with a desire not to embarrass or harm anyone close to me. My wife has known about my love for heels for most of our married life, but until a couple of years ago I hardly ever ventured out in public wearing them.

She will now come out with me when I'm wearing block heeled boots or wedges, and I know I'm very very fortunate in this. However, I believe the biggest problem with most of us is the six inches between the ears. We're worried that everyone is staring at us and laughing at us, and terrified of meeting someone we know.

One of my wife's friends and a couple of others in the same business as me know about my heels and are completely OK with it. I went on the train to a company conference last Saturday in 4.5 inch wedges under a business suit. Seven hours in the train and walking between trains, seven hours at the conference with over 5,000 people present. Loads of people must have seen them, but I got not one comment, not one sign of amusement or disgust, apart from a giggle I heard from a teenager behind me, but even then it might not have been at seeing my heels.

My reason for wearing them, if anyone asks, is that they are a miraculous cure for backache. My back aches if I stand or walk around for more than a few minutes, but heels are an instant cure. I'm not the only one who finds this, as this article shows: http://home.bt.com/lifestyle/four-inch-heels-cure-mans-bad-back-now-he-cant-stop-wearing-them-for-charity-11363970352666

The fact that I absolutely adore wearing them is another matter...

Anyway, that's me. I have about two dozen pairs of heels, from two inch cowboy boots to 7.5 inch stilettos, but recently I've been more and more interested in street heels of at least four inches.

 

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15 hours ago, Russ in boots said:

I know I've become less and less worried about what people think, but that is an almighty hurdle for most of us. My wish to do just whatever I want is tempered with a desire not to embarrass or harm anyone close to me. My wife has known about my love for heels for most of our married life, but until a couple of years ago I hardly ever ventured out in public wearing them.

She will now come out with me when I'm wearing block heeled boots or wedges, and I know I'm very very fortunate in this. However, I believe the biggest problem with most of us is the six inches between the ears. We're worried that everyone is staring at us and laughing at us, and terrified of meeting someone we know.

 

I could have pretty much written the same things about myself.  (If I haven't already. ;) :D) I get a bit more latitude with heel shape, but Mrs Freddy has now several times, passed comment (as only women can ;)) on the toe shape of my current wear-everywhere-boot. If I'm honest, they are quite pointy, but they are comfortable. As long as the footwear looks like a boot, and not a court shoe, I've pretty much an open choice. Oh, and I've got to be able to walk in them of course!

 

15 hours ago, Russ in boots said:

The fact that I absolutely adore wearing them is another matter...

 

Yep, that too. B)

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Interesting you mentioned heels as a cure for back pain. I have a very, very dodgy back and putting on my otk boots with the two-and-three-quarter inch chunk heels immediately takes a lot of the stress from my lower back. They are indeed therapeutic! 

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May I also welcome you here, Russ.   You will find several like-minded members to exchange intelligent views with.   As a matter of interest, in which area of the UK do you live?

I can identify with most of the above comments.   I like heels (on women, and for discreet wearing myself) and have also found them beneficial for lower-back and leg pain.   However, my wife disapproves of my 'interest' and would certainly blow her top if she knew of my wearing activity.   As things stand, she is aware of my cuban-heeled men's boots (which she dislikes but tolerates) and also dislikes me wearing anything pointed.   I have to be careful but I am not prepared to completely abandon my harmless and casual pursuit just because she has different ideas.   

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6 hours ago, Puffer said:

However, my wife disapproves of my 'interest' and would certainly blow her top if she knew of my wearing activity.   As things stand, she is aware of my cuban-heeled men's boots (which she dislikes but tolerates) and also dislikes me wearing anything pointed. 

Since our respective spouse's (spices :D) are almost certainly included in our intellectual 'friend' group, I would expect some measure of tolerance from them, just as you might expect some tolerance from any friend (I would hope). What I wonder is the main reason for reluctance? Mrs Freddy is hardly encouraging per se, but would rather I indulge in an interest than spend time moping around feeling hard-done-by. That said, she has made no secret of the fact we are a couple while I'm out in heels, by holding my arm as we walk. Although it may not be directly intended, it's a very pleasant sensation (to feel the comfort of my partner while I wear a heel). This, even while I wear the shoes she has mentioned as having quite 'pointy toes'....

For my part there are no secrets, save the size/value of my collection, and we both defer from any discussion regarding the value. My past, which I mentioned recently, has been well known for nearly all our time together. I don't tend to be a wallflower, and have some history in carving out a lifestyle I want to live live in, rather than imagine. I'm lucky in having had associations throughout my life, with women who find innovation slightly attractive. :D If only I had the same attitude toward making money!

 

While I had started writing here thinking I might make the reluctance of partners, the debating subject, I don't know it needs debating? People like what they know, and are comforted by familiarity. Anything unusual or unfamiliar, disrupts that feeling of security and comfort surely? Isn't it that simple?

 

 

Edited by FastFreddy2
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It is exactly that simple.

There is also the tacit desire to meet the expectations of, and maintain the approval of, others within our sphere and a sort of self censorship and conservatism and hesitancy that often goes with it. Nobody wants to rock the boat. 

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3 hours ago, Shyheels said:

Good point, but even those who rock generally do so carefully - out of consideration for others, perhaps, rather than trepidation.

As I've said many times, I'm no martyr, (to the cause) and I would never intentionally embarrass my wife or anyone she and I know either.

But I'm not overly concerned about raising eyebrows from 'the public'. I don't have any agenda, and I don't expect people to be disrespectful or rude, just because I've slightly non-conformist tastes in clothing. "Don't like it? Well carry on and mind your own, just as you would if I were wearing a man's shoe." 

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13 hours ago, Shyheels said:

I wasn't suggestion you were anything but considerate to those close to you. I agree with you entirely as regards the oublic in general!

No, my mistake. :(

I had misunderstood the meaning of your comment. To be honest, even now (having re-read it several times) I still struggle to comprehend it correctly. But I do at least recognise the generality of it, and it's favourable theme. B)

 

By an absolutely amazing co-incidence ..... >> here <<

Edited by FastFreddy2
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5 hours ago, Russ in boots said:

Just a twist on this: I have some cowboy boots with 3.5 inch heels and a very long pointed toe. My wife says these are the boots she prefers to see me in if I have to wear heels, but in my opinion the toes on them are too pointy!

On that basis, Russ, I would be willing to swap my wife for yours!   :huh:

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