Puffer

The 'travelling' comments above are interesting and, yet again, have parallels with my own experiences. I do not claim to be widely travelled and, until fairly recently, was unlikely to have a foreign holiday of any substance as I (i) I had better things to waste money on; (ii) could easily get bored with most sun-worshipping/sightseeing activity; (iii) have no sporting interests whatsoever; (iv) resented the time and effort spent in getting to an airport at some unearthly hour, going through increasingly tiresome formalities and then flying over my own house some hours after leaving it. My wife, however, has always been quite adventurous and had travelled widely overseas (as well as living and working elsewhere in Europe) before I met her. Something I did greatly enjoy and did almost annually in the 80s/90s was to spend a week on the English canals in a narrowboat, as one of a group of like-minded friends. Relaxing, yet active, convivial and never boring, I found it an ideal way to unwind. Alas, growing family and other commitments within the group effectively put paid to this annual treat, although the participants do remain in touch for other occasional social events. Recent years have however resulted in some changes, largely due to increased leisure time and less concern over finances. In particular, we discovered cruising (on a ship, that is!) and now have an annual cruise with several further ones in mind. It isn't our only holiday or outside activity but it is proving an enjoyable one with a very acceptable blend of relaxation and change of scene - not to speak of good food and, usually, good company. There are certainly some areas of the world that I would not wish to visit, for cultural or political reasons. High on the list is anywhere connected with current or recent terrorism, for obvious reasons. As I write, I have a stepson serving with the RAF 'somewhere in the Middle East', whose role is (I understand) not unconnected with some long-overdue and welcome news breaking today; draw your own conclusions. Fortunately, his work does not involve front-line personal exposure. I am reasonably widely travelled within the UK. An interest in railways and a need for business travel in a former life both saw to that. But nowadays I do not so often stray from my home area; travelling costs (whether by car or public transport) and traffic jams are no encouragement to exploration as distinct from necessary forays. And so many so-called 'attractions' prove either mediocre or a rip-off that I am wary of them.

I am not ashamed to say that I miss C&A. I always found its trousers, jumpers and shirts to be a good fit, hard-wearing and reasonably priced. But Primark has more or less filled the gap and probably has more variety in casual clothes. That said, I now buy very few clothes as I have more than enough already - including some very nice cast-offs (mainly shirts and jeans) from my two sons (now 37 and 34), who seem to get bored with good-quality stuff and are glad to ditch it. (Although we are all the same shoe size, we don't seem to share footwear; I don't think our tastes really coincide and the boys certainly don't wear heels - as far as I know!)

Yes, there is a time and place for ambiguity, whether intentional, ironic or otherwise. I once told a friend, on learning that he had been recently hospitalised after a car crash: 'I'm sorry to hear that you're recovering from an accident'. The two-edged comment was not intended to suggest that I applauded his injury rather than his recovery - but I quite understood the look of surprise he gave me, and he then quite understood my embarrassment. There are many better examples!

This confusion (if indeed there is one) has arisen because I listed four discrete categories of potential male participants, of which the last was unspecified and open to suggestion. Replies referring to 'the latter' logically referred to that last unspecified category (which remained unspecified) but did in fact more or less fit the third one, as subsequent exchanges confirmed. If I framed the original statement in a manner which caused misunderstanding, then I apologise. Perhaps, at the risk of over-formality, I should have given each category a number! An answer to a question may be accurate to the best of a respondent's knowledge and belief, but if the question was misunderstood and the answer no longer 'fits', then it is not by definition an accurate answer to the question actually asked. But I think your point, Freddy, is more that a majority view must defeat a minority one. Sorry, but that cannot be true if the matter is being dealt with truly objectively - although the parameters of the objectivity may themselves be under debate. If there can be little factual doubt that some specified trees are indeed green, it doesn't matter how many people see them subjectively as blue - they are all wrong (because respondents are possibly colourblind?). They have provided a valid opinion in good faith (subjective) but it may be defeated by information that effectively constitutes the definitive and authoritative statement of fact (objective). On the other hand, of course, there may be no factual answer to a question where only subjective opinion is possible, e.g. 'Does beer taste good?' Most of my professional life has been spent in drafting technical/legal documents and writing articles on similar matters. I am therefore mindful of the need for clear, intelligible language (as well as good English) that maximises understanding and minimises doubt or ambiguity. I hope that I have broadly succeeded; my track record elsewhere (including appearance in court as an expert witness) suggests that I have. One rule I am conscious of is that of contra proferentem: that any ambiguity in a document will be construed against the person who drafted it. A point to keep in mind when trying to bulldoze the opposition by stipulating all the terms of a contract etc. I had not heard of Poka-yoke by that name, but of course the concept of idiot-proofing is well understood. It can be applied to written instructions, questionnaires etc but, alas, it often is not. Just look at a self-assessment tax return if you want some examples of questions that cannot be answered in the manner HMRC expects if they are interpreted as they have been simply (and inaccurately) written. By the way, nothing I've written above is intended as a full and authoritative statement of fact relating to any matter addressed or ignored - so there!

You and me both. But, aside from any embarrassment, don't we all have a handful (at least) of very vivid and distinct long-term memories of seeing a woman (or maybe a man) wearing some particularly attractive shoes? I certainly recall several sightings from the 1960s that not only turned my head but were burnt into my memory - and still emerge regularly as a yardstick (or perhaps Holy Grail) when considering the ideal feminine look. One day (soon), when I start to go gaga, I will hang onto those memories even more tightly.

You raise some interesting points, Freddy. I will respond briefly and would point out that some may take exception to any word below which (like me in heels) is emboldened when seen in public: 1. Yes, 'or what' did invite others to provide an additional interpretation; but I don't think I got one, despite it being the true subject of 'the latter' - hence my query. Hence my assumption (now confirmed) that it was the third of my four suggestions that you had both chosen. 2. 'Theatricals' is indeed a fair label for a fourth camp. It overlaps with others but we can pretty well envisage the wide range of gentle-men that this label embraces. 3. Crossdressing (with or without the hyphen) is of course a very vague concept and you are right that it has little or no significance when a woman is the subject, although its regularity or acceptability does not per se create an oxymoron (or even a cowymoron), as a woman in male clothing is still, literally, crossdressing. And it is indeed a one-way street, unfortunately. As to frontiersmen, I am reminded of one Davy Crockett, a very popular character in the mid-50s, thanks to some Disney films and a memorable song. The question often asked in the playground was 'How many ears does Davy Crockett have?'. The expected answer: 'A left ear, a right ear and a wild frontier'.

I was addressing Shyheels in my last above - and he is undoubtedly a very singular fellow. (Reminds me of one of many anecdotes about the late Sir Thomas Beecham. On spying a newcomer to his orchestra in rehearsal, he asked the bloke's name. 'Ball, sir' was the reply - to which Sir Thomas responded 'How very singular'.

Hmmm. I am in somewhat of a quandary in interpreting your respective remarks: (i) reference to 'the latter' is, strictly, not applicable where more than two items have been listed; the last in such a list should be cited as 'the last-named'. But, pedantry aside, my 'last-named' was in fact the unspecified 'or what'. If, as I infer, you both favour the penultimate item (i.e. crossdressers), I would tend to agree. But many unduly sensitive souls would opine that crossdressing and a tendency towards looseness of the wrist are not readily linked and may well be mutually exclusive. (After all, any man wearing at least some items of female clothing is a 'crossdresser' but very likely to be otherwise essentially manly and not playing for the other side .) (ii) may I assume that we agree that the likely interest of the participants is primarily in wearing female clothes (or at least footwear), either for pleasure or for theatrical purposes, regardless of orientation? If so, are not most of us in the former sub-set - and probably with very firm wrists after all the cycling and DIY etc that we indulge in? Answers, please, on an electronic postcard ...

I came across this in the online Daily Mail: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3280759/Flat-shoes-drag-Austrian-academy-teaches-MEN-walk-high-heels-s-33-class.html I'm not too sure what to make of it. The classes seem to be responding to a genuine demand but the status/interest of the participants is not clear. Are they just heel-loving ordinary blokes (like us) who are brave enough to 'go public', or would-be drag artists, or crossdressers, or what? Did Conchita Wurst really start a trend, or at least act as a catalyst?

Quite possibly. My immediate thought was along the lines of 'Russell & Bromley', or 'Stead & Simpson' as we are two kindred 'soles'. And, if Freddy was to join us, then 'Freeman, Hardy & Willis' would suit. (Do you remember that outfit and the others from Charles Clore's erstwhile empire?) But, having looked up this duo (of whom I had never previously heard), I can see how apt they are - if that's all right with you, my dear fellow.

Really, Freddy? I suggested above that Campari was only fit for cleaning paintbrushes; you appear to be using the gin for similar artist-related purposes. But maybe you find it appeals to your palate as a beverage.

At the risk of sounding like the old fart I probably am, I have to say that the Bond films interest me hardly at all these days. In my book, Sean Connery was the one true Bond, with credible plots and characters, and From Russia with Love the best of the bunch, with a gradual deterioration after Goldfinger. The Roger Moore series, fun though they were, simply made the villains more and more ridiculous, the stunts less and less possible and the humour mostly out of place - and nothing since has redeemed the genre. I have seen them all since (I think) apart from Spectre (won't bother either) and thought that Skyfall was poor, if not complete rubbbish - and worsened by that dreadful mournful dirge of a song. I'm rapidly gaining the view that most entertainment, along with a large measure of lifestyle, has gone steadily downhill since Grace Archer died. And now we are in danger of stilettos going out of fashion (again) ...

Freddy: if the basin taps were set in glazier's putty, now fully hardened, I doubt you would detect any significant linseed oil smell unless you warmed the putty up. Plumbers Mait, on the other hand, has and retains a fairly distinct smell. But it could have been PM used, although it would scarcely contain the movement of a tap in the hole, as distinct from giving a seal round the tap stem. I await with bated breath the results of your forensic examination ... It's been a rather frustrating DIY time here at home this weekend. I had to replace an increasingly unreliable semi-integrated dishwasher and chose a mid-range Bosch. Leaving aside the extra work needed to jack-up the new machine (blocks of wood as well as the screw-down feet) because Herr Bosch seems to think that all worktops are somewhat lower than I have normally 'encountered' (pun unintended until just then), the actual preparation and installation of the machine was something of a protracted and complex process, although I had no problems with the existing plumbing (water or waste) and electric connections. As seems increasingly common, the 'orders which must be obeyed' (aka 'instructions') were in the form of a pictogram with almost no words (English or otherwise). In other words, neat but by no means crystal clear drawings which are intended to be understood by anyone from Dublin to Damascus (via Dundee, D'Avignon and Dalaman) but in practice are intelligible to almost no-one - except perhaps the proverbial four-year-old boy (who, alas, was not to hand). And the various tools required (including Torx drivers) are not immediately apparent, although my workshop had them all 'in stock'. Quite a lot of head-scratching and profanity was involved before I got the thing installed and, after further wrestling with 'operational orders' - in English of a sort but again accompanied by dubious drawings, performing an initial wash-up to the satisfaction of my customer (i.e. SWMBO). I did not have the same problems with either of the previous dishwashers - a new Baumatic followed by a secondhand (but almost new) Indesit, the latter being without any instructions. However good and reliable the Bosch proves to be, I was not impressed with the preliminaries. I strongly suspect that the average householder, however keen and basically competent, would struggle with a like-for-like replacement (as in my case) needing no external plumbing or electrical work - and would likely give up altogether if it was a new installation. Perhaps that is the intention: 'tis the duty of the common man to make work for the artisan'. I don't think the pictogram problems etc are unique to German products as I had similar issues when installing some Velux sun tunnels a while ago. On the other hand, my VW car has a comprehensive but not always comprehensible manual that has still, after some eight years of ownership, failed to acquaint me fully with all the mysteries of what I consider an over-sophisticated piece of automotive engineering - and one which is by no means user-friendly when what should be straightforward tasks (e.g. replacing a blown bulb, let alone a headlamp unit) need to be tackled at home. All part of life's steep (and potentially expensive) learning-curve, I guess ...

Tech does not say what we should be looking for, but I do note that dates in picture banner are now in proper British format, as I had requested, and assume this is the change (or one of them). If so, thanks for that.

I think it very unlikely that any PM was used in mounting the taps or waste, Freddy. It is an effective sealant but I have never known it to go hard; the whole point of PM is that it is a non-setting mastic. I strongly suspect that it was ordinary glazier's putty that was used to fill the excess space around the taps - an old-fashioned and traditional but pretty effective process. Putty looks much like PM (er - 'putty coloured') but does set hard of course. If old putty is set hard and mechanical removal might damage porcelain or taps etc, it can usually be softened by using paint stripper. (That is a handy dodge too when trying to remove old putty from delicate areas of a window frame.) Did you hear what happened to the randy DIY fan who didn't know the difference between putty and KY Jelly? Yes - you've guessed - all his window panes fell out! I've never used a Basin Mate so will reserve an opinion. I usually set wastes in silicone to get an effective seal to porcelain. I don't think you would get very far trying to get PM (or anything else) to adhere to PTFE tape - it is after all a 'non-stick' product (except of course when the frying pan has been used more than once).

Nice! Could we please change the thread title to simply 'Kelly Brook'? Apart from the fact that (mercifully) she is not wearing platforms in any recent pics, the words 'lovely' and 'platforms' do not readily go together imho. Indeed, I spy an oxymoron (and I don't mean Kelly).

Your assumption was a fair one. I used to smoke a pipe but gave it up more than six years ago. I will still have a small cigar perhaps five times a year. I think the nom-de-plume originated at work in the late 60s when it was applied as a nickname to recognise both my pipe-smoking and my known interest in railways, but the exact circumstances are now lost in the mists (smoke?) of time. I do recall that, in that same workplace, my aromatic pipe smoke caused a colleague to enquire 'What is that you're smoking?'. I was busy adding up a column of figures and dismissed him with a rather curt 'That's my business' - to which he immediately responded 'Well, it certainly smells like it!'. Happy days ...

I suppose £250 would have been OK for first-quality AS items not on clearance, but I would normally expect a good mid-range suite (i.e. inc bath) for that money! Still, it was good that you were able to salvage the WC cistern. 13 years ago, during a bathroom refit at home, I chanced upon a complete spa-bath suite (i.e. bath with fitted jets, pump, blower, basin/pedestal, cc WC, taps, traps) being sold ex-display at B&Q for £250. It was slightly marked (customer abuse) and a couple of the spa bath control knobs were found missing after I bought it. The spa bath manufacturer was very helpful with some technical info and supplied the missing bits at nominal cost - which B&Q refunded cheerfully. The price new would have been nearly £1,000 and the whole set-up worked well, so I was pleased (as was the wife). The marks (mainly odd scratches in the bath) were of little consequence as they would have appeared anyway after a period of use, but I diminished them with some Perspex polish and elbow grease. Let me know how you get on with the mains issue - 'no pressure'!

No, I did not; the A4 gathering was not special to my interests, albeit special for many others. My interest in railways is essentially (a) operation and history - largely from my armchair; (b) operation in preservation (50 years' service on a particular heritage line). Whilst I will travel on interesting railways and look at museum exhibits etc, I don't go out of my way to make many special journeys to the venues these days - by train or otherwise (see other posts!). And 'modern' railways (post-1970 or so) do very little for me; their character has changed beyond all recognition.

1. Are you saying that AS thought you had been over-charged, even though it was allegedly a discount bargain? AS products are not normally cheap, but quality is usually reliable. I do agree with the principle of buy cheap and make it work; in my experience (in most fields), you do not get what you pay for, except perhaps at the very extremes of the price range. (Funnily enough, the nice new inset basin I put in at my flat is an AS - £2.00 at a boot-sale! It lacked the fixing clamps but they were easily made. And the shower bath is also AS, bought as 'unwanted' through the local paper.) 2. Obstructing the flow (locally) should limit splashing from too great a volume under high pressure. Yes, a PRV might well do the job more succinctly but it may not be really necessary. But then I haven't seen the system, and if pressure is very high, a PRV might be the only effective solution. You might want to speak to your water supplier; it is possible the main is at the wrong pressure.

I'm sure you are right, Freddy, about general group meetings. There is a difference however if and when two or three like-minded people get discreetly together by arrangement, probably encouraged by existing online contact. We haven't met but we are engaging in regular intercourse , so I am open to sensible suggestions. I loathe tattoos (with or without an extraneous apostrophe ) but am interested in 'trains' (or more accurately 'railways').

Not strictly true, Freddy - and certainly not if you use the 10 - 10,000 comparison. Insurance premium is mileage-sensitive and servicing/repair costs likewise (although also time-sensitive, e.g. oil change each year regardless of mileage). Your tyres and brake pads (and I hope you have four of each) will possibly last 25,000 miles but I wouldn't count on it - and the brake discs too are likely to need renewal these days; I would guess 2p - 3p per mile for that lot. Depreciation, and interest on capital etc, may be low but it is never zero and a replacement car will be needed sooner if the mileage is increased. Yes, the marginal cost is relevant, but really only for 'marginal use'. The more you use the car, the cheaper it is per (extra) mile, but there is a big wodge of standing or recurrent costs to absorb for even low mileage usage. There is no magic solution; it always comes down to preference and convenience and I'm certainly not suggesting you are 'wrong' to prefer the car. (Only yesterday, I travelled an extra two miles to fill up with diesel (before it is banned totally in the UK!) because the pump price was several pence cheaper, but inevitably wasted at least 30p in direct costs in doing so. I am now doing penance - forcing myself to wear flat shoes for a whole day.) Brum is worth a visit; I know it quite well from many trips over the years. Quite a good place for a heely jaunt, I guess. And a cheapo train ride would be relaxing; I've seen them from Marylebone but doubtless there are others.

That over-priced and poorly designed suite sounds as though it came from Bathstore, Freddy. I fitted one once for a friend and had various problems, especially with poorly-formed fixing holes through porcelain, at risk of causing a crack. And it is very common for basins not to sit nicely on pedestals, or for the bowl not to be level (front-back) if the back is sitting nicely flush with a truly vertical wall. I usually employ a good squirt of white silicone twixt basin and pedestal (a) to give a cushion and take up some irregularity; (b) to prevent movement. In a really bad case, a little packing can be buried in the silcone too - offcuts of vinyl sheet are very useful for this (and under pedestals and in 1001 other DIY applications where a smallish gap needs to be filled). I don't think you need to worry about max mains water pressure in any properly-made plastic plumbing; they are designed for such and, in fact, the increasing pressure tends to make the grab-rings 'bite' even more. Rather than messy about with a PRV (£15 - 20 wasted), why not just partially close the isolating valve to the cold tap? (Or if the problem is a general one, partially close the main stopcock, cock.) Be grateful that you have enough pressure for all normal purposes! A simple flow-checker will indicate the mains pressure, but its 'bar value' is not really of interest (except when installing a boiler or other sensitive kit) - if it runs right at the tap (no drenching), it is right.

Just as well no-one attempted to meet you in London, then, Freddy? (At least, I hope not.) You could have invited all to join you in the bathroom for a drink (or soaking) of water instead. My friend is an industrial chemist; I didn't imply that his job (or even workplace) was upmarket - it is just the town name that gives that impression. (St. Reatham in Sarf Lunnon is comparable.)

As to flying, I have no particular liking for it, although one cannot deny the advantages of time and directness. The bugbear (and it is getting worse, as we know) is the time wasted in getting to an airport a couple of hours before take-off, going through all the intrusive formalities and then (assuming the plane leaves on time) very often passing above my own house some four hours after leaving it, usually at an unearthly hour! Gatwick is 24 miles away and my wife and I usually use it for holidays, sometimes getting a lift there and back from family or friends. If not, we have used a 'park-and-minibus' outfit quite conveniently placed on our route to the airport, which typically costs about £5 per day over 7 - 14 days if pre-booked with every discount taken, but the cost is still resented. In September, my wife went away with one of her sons and I had the opportunity to travel (alone) to spend a week with friends in Spain, before they sold their villa. There was no-one who could give me a lift to Gatwick (although the wife could and did collect me on my late-evening return*) and the parking outfit wanted more than £60 - an unacceptable sum (almost half my air-fare). As I had to check-in by about 7.30am latest, my options were limited: the cheapest was to leave home at about 5.25am, trundle my case 0.7m to the nearest station (in bad weather?) and then catch three trains for the otherwise fairly direct run to Gatwick at a cost of £12.90, to arrive about 7.15. These were almost the first trains of the day and I was a little worried about the two connections working out. In the end, I booked a taxi (£12) at 5.30 to another station (saving the 'trundle' and the first train) and took the other two trains (£11.60). All went very smoothly and I was checking-in just after opening time at 7.15. But the plane was then delayed by about 80mins by a 'technical issue' ...! *Wifey could hardly refuse the pick-up; I had taken her to Heathrow (dreadful place) at a very early hour for her trip a few days before mine - and then had to return there the next day to pick-up another son and his girl-friend. Fortunately, the M25 was not misbehaving on either occasion.